Failure...and the changes that follow

The broken dreams, from their dishonoured graves, question the only living thing in d graveyard- me. And I stand speechless while the echoes of their silent cries deafend my ears. These are the domes of the dreams i had seen for myself one day, long back. Today all of them are crowned with failure and I stand to the epitome of failures.

Being a child, i had a dream. Before i could devise ways to achieve it, i flunked deliberately and to make the matter worse, it was the last chance. I couldnt even edge success. My dream, like an unnoticed piece of glass, slipped from my clutch and before it could hit the ground and shatter, it disappeared. Had it shattered, i would have dreamt of resurrecting it, but it didnt. Breaking of a dream is no big deal but provided its a one-time-chance, it is. As long as a player wins, he is applauded. One failure, and he is abandoned. Thats what i am now- abandoned. I am alone, amidst the playground. No eyes watching me, no claps encouraging me, no awards awaiting me. Just because i lost? No, its worse. Its because i let others down. 'Others', who were never mine but i was always theirs, until now.

Scowls and scorns found me a juicy victim. Frustration almost digested me with a clumsy apetite. Boredom gulped me the whole day and to get rid of it i adorned myself in crowded places. Even the crowd couldnt rescue me from malicious isolation. I was damn being tortured by the loneliness. I wanted to escape to a secluded place to seek for peace. I wanted to take cover but i found no roof safe. The goons of loneliness searched me from all my hideouts. I was chained in its dark dungeons to succumb to its malice. Had i someone to charge me up, i would have broken free of loneliness. But even my strengths turned backs. Seeing all my hopes fall one by one, i decided to give up. Like a victorious emperor, loneliness marched towards me. With anguished eyes, petrified by the footsteps, i awaited my fate. The emperor neared me as i neared my end. He pointed his lusty sword at me and asked me to love the essence of loneliness. The message incited a thought in my mind. He was right indeed. He hadnt snubbed me but showed me a way to survive. I lamented over the futile effort of escaping from the thought of being alone.

I realised that the best shelter to escape from loneliness is under loneliness itself.

To stay with the whole world, make sure you have enough fruits of success in your hands. If you run short of success, you run short of loved ones. Staying in a crowd arouses a fear of being abandoned at any moment but being alone forfeits all fear. Loneliness is the best friend to enjoy with. It never forsakes you. When loneliness becomes bliss, its solitude.